Poor dog

Poor Dog - I'd better go look for its owner :)

Homeopathy : A Primer

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In this classic Mitchell and Webb  skit Homeopathic A & E the two english comedians play doctors bemoaning the death of a patient. 

With dialogue like this, what's not to love?:

Webb: Sometimes I think a trace solution of deadly nightshade or a statistically negligible quantity of arsenic just isn’t enough.

Mitchell: That’s crazy talk, Simon. OK, so you kill the odd patient with cancer or heart disease… or bronchitis, flu, chicken pox or measles… but when someone comes in with a vague sense of unease or a touch of the nerves or even just more money than sense, you’ll be there for them. Bottle of basically just water in one hand and a huge invoice in the other. 

Sex Sells: Clean your balls

Nobody likes dirty balls. Lynx Shower Gel and Body Buffer can help you get your balls back into play.




Lots of laughs from this Lynx dirty balls advert. With funny Lynx ads like this they'll keep their target "lads" demographic coming back for more.

The Way of the Future - China in the C21 - time to learn mandarin

Check out this amazing video of chinese building company Broad Group building a 30 story building in in just 15 days (360 hours)!:





Clearly China is going to be THE economic powerhouse of the 21st Century. That's why I've decided to learn Mandarin - to stay engaged, I've chosen to do it with help from an inovative teaching company:

Coolest iPad App Ever

This is the best iPad App ever. I am going to go download it now.




How cool is an ipad app that produces free beer from your ipad?

I wonder how many.....?

I wonder how many little boys and girls are saying this prayer tonight - hopefully not mine!

International Star Wars Day

Today is the day set aside to celebrate the fantastic Spielberg movies (and bad puns!).

May the 4th be with YOU

From Wikipedia: May 4 is considered a holiday by Star Wars fans to celebrate Star Wars culture and honor the films.

May 4 is called Star Wars Day because of the popularity of a common pun spoken on this day. Since the phrase "May the Force be with you" is a famous quote often spoken in the Star Wars films, fans commonly say "May the fourth be with you"on this day. Current day Star Wars fans were not the first to introduce the line "May the fourth be with you": when Margaret Thatcher was elected Britain's first female Prime Minister on May 4, 1979, her party placed an advertisement in The London Evening News that said "May the Fourth Be with You, Maggie. Congratulations." This reading of the line has also been recorded in the UK Parliament's Hansard.

In a 2005 interview on German news TV channel N24, George Lucas was asked to say the famous sentence "May the Force be with you." The interpreter simultaneously interpreted the sentence into German as Am 4. Mai sind wir bei Ihnen ("We shall be with you on May 4"). This was captured byTV Total and aired on May 18, 2005.

Did somebody say....?

It's all about the game!

We've been unable to authenticate this photo, but if true it shows just how dedicated the crowd is, as they watch the football game while the building behind them burns.

Modern Barbie - Barbie for the 21st Century

Fantastic to see Mattel Inc. constantly re-inventing Barbie for the ages. This year Barbie will be releasing "I can be president" Barbie (true), Cancer Survivor Barbie (maybe) and as this pic shows, Long Term Relationship Barbie (ok, that one isn't true!).

One Benefit of Running for Political Office

Some more funny statistics

They say there are "lies, damned lies and statistics" but some statistics just don't lie!

Was the internet down?

"Wow honey, the house is so clean? Was the internet down for a while today?". This guy likes living on the edge!

Funny Dogs Riding Surfboards

We think that dogs riding surfboards is just about one of th funniest things you can see on video. We found this great dog riding surfboard youtube video to be soooo funny and so we thought we'd share it.




Looking for more official dog riding surfboard videos? Visit http://www.surfingdogspectacular.com/

Official Drop Bear Warning Poster

(click image to enlarge)

Unfortunately many people simply refuse to believe that Drop Bears exist, are out there an dangerous. Even Wikipedia calls Drop Bears "a ficticious Australian Marsupial"! However, don't be fulled by dis-information from "Drop Bear Deniers". The truth is out there! For more information about the Australian Drop Bear, visit the Australian Museum website. Here is an extract from the official drop bear information published by the Australian Museum:

The Drop Bear, Thylarctos plummetus, is a large, arboreal, predatory marsupial related to the Koala.

Identification

Around the size of a leopard or very large dog with coarse orange fur with some darker mottled patterning (as seen in most Koalas). It is a heavily built animal with powerful forearms for climbing and holding on to prey. It lacks canines, using broad powerful premolars as biting tools instead.

Size range

120kg, 130cm long, 90 cm at the shoulder.

Distribution

Drop Bears can be found in the densely forested regions of the Great Dividing Range in South-eastern Australia. However there are also some reports of them from South-east South Australia, Mount Lofty Ranges and Kangaroo Island.

Habitat

Closed canopy forest as well as open woodland on the margins of dense forest. Never encountered near roads or human habitation.

Behaviour and adaptations

Feeding and Diet

Examination of kill sites and scats suggest mainly medium to large species of mammal make a substantial proportion of the animal's diet. Often, prey such as macropods are larger than the Drop Bear itself.
Drop Bears hunt by ambushing ground dwelling animals from above, waiting up to as much as four hours to make a surprise kill. Once prey is within view, the Drop Bear will drop as much as eight metres to pounce on top of the unsuspecting victim. The initial impact often stuns the prey, allowing it to be bitten on the neck and quickly subdued.
If the prey is small enough Drop Bears will haul it back up the tree to feed without harassment from other predators.

Feeding Habit

carnivorous

Mating and reproduction

Breeding occurs during summer and usually one baby, or joey, is produced each year. After six months in the pouch, the joey is gradually weaned from milk.

Era / Period

Quaternary Period

Living with us

Danger to humans and first aid

Bush walkers have been known to be 'dropped on' by drop bears, resulting in injury including mainly lacerations and occasionally bites. Most attacks are considered accidental and there are no reports of incidents being fatal.
There are some suggested folk remedies that are said to act as a repellent to Drop Bears, these include having forks in the hair or Vegemite or toothpaste spread behind the ears. There is no evidence to suggest that any such repellents work.

Classification

Species:

plummetus

Genus:

Thylarctos

For those interested in examples of Drop Bear mis-information, here is the full text from Wikipedia on the Drop Bear:

A drop bear (or dropbear) is a fictitious Australian marsupial.^[1] Drop bears are commonly said to be unusually large, vicious, carnivorous koalas that inhabit treetops and attack their prey by dropping onto their heads from above.^[2] They are an example of local lore intended to frighten and confuse outsiders and amuse locals, similar to the jackalope, hoop snake, wild haggis, or snipe hunt.
It is often suggested that doing ridiculous things like having forks in the hair or Vegemite or toothpaste spread behind the ears will deter the creatures.^[3]

In popular culture

• Drop bears appear in the novel The Last Continent by Terry Pratchett. In the novel, the wizard Rincewind travels through the Australia-like continent of Fourecks, and is attacked by most of the creatures while travelling through the desert. Rincewind is wearing the traditional pointed wizard's hat, which serves to protect Rincewind's head from the stunning blow of the bear, and stun the bear itself. When the first bear's attack is unsuccessful, a massive cadre of dropbears begins to fall from the trees out of sheer astonishment. When hearing about this later, the locals insist that drop bears do not really exist.
• Escape Velocity Nova, an Australian-designed 2002 computer game from Ambrosia Software, contains attacks from alleged drop bears in Auroran Empire space. These drop bears are actually young Auroran warriors in disguise. The game also features drop bear attacks and repellents. Purchase of the repellent, which cannot subsequently be discarded, dramatically increases the rate of drop bear attacks.
• A Bundaberg Rum ad features Australian male campers using stories about drop bears to lure attractive female backpackers into moving their tents close to them. The blonde backpackers are incredulous until the Bundy Rum bear (a large talking polar bear often featured in the company's advertising) drops out of a tree near the edge of the lake, destroying one of the girls' tents.
• In Warren Ellis's comic Nextwave, in the July 2006 # 5 issue, weaponized drop bears are deployed from an air-based military platform.^[4]
• Australian cartoonist Ian Dalkin had a popular cartoon strip 'Derek the Drop-Bear' which ran in the Sydney Sun, a defunct Sydney afternoon newspaper.^{[citation needed]}
• Drop bears are one of the many enemies described in the d20 Menace Manual.
• The Australian Museum has a purportedly serious entry on drop bears in its catalogue of Australian fauna.^[5]. However elsewhere the museum acknowledges that this entry is a joke.^[6]
• Joystiq.com's Xbox 360 Fancast podcast made Drop Bears a regular theme on their weekly podcast before it was cancelled. It rapidly became a meme between the hosts and their listeners.

Best Billboard Placement Ever?

(click Image to Enlarge)

I'm not sure the juxtaposition of this "where's daddy" billboard by WorkSafe and the billboard by a certain "gentleman's club" even needs a caption.

Plates of Plastic - Its Fantastic

Pop culture's now rife with unAustralian behaviour. Sam Kekovich's antidote is to create 'Chop Culture' and go viral himself with his 'chop song': "Barbie Girl".






You know it makes sense. (Starring pop starlet Melissa Tkautz, Australia's Got Talent winners Justice Crew and pop guru Richard Wilkins).

Want to know all the lyrics to Sam Kekovich's Barbie Girl? You can sign along to the Karaoke version here!


Happy Australia Day!

Something you just can't do at a brothel!

Following his official state visit to the White House, Nicolas Sarkozy, the President of France, finds the red light district in Washington DC and enters a large brothel. The madam asks him to be seated and sends over a young lady to entertain him.

      They  sit  and  talk, frolic a little, giggle a bit, drink a bit, and
      she  sits  on  his lap. He whispers in her ear and she gasps and runs
      away!  Seeing  this,  the madam sends over a more experienced lady to
      entertain the gentleman.

      They  sit  and  talk, frolic a little, giggle a bit, drink a bit, and
      she  sits  on  his  lap. He whispers in her ear, and she too screams,
      "No!" and walks quickly away.

      The  madam  is surprised that this handsome looking man has asked for
      something  so  outrageous  that her two girls will have nothing to do
      with him. She decides that only her most experienced lady, Lola, will
      do.  Lola  has  never  said  no,  and  it's not likely anything would
      surprise her.

      So  the  madam  sends her over to Sarkozy. The sit and talk, frolic a
      little,  giggle  a  bit,  drink  a  bit,  and she sits on his lap. He
      whispers  in her ear and she screams, "NO WAY, BUDDY!" and smacks him
      as hard as she can and leaves.

      Madam  is  by now absolutely intrigued, having seen nothing like this
      in  all her years of operating a brothel. She hasn't done the bedroom
      work  herself  for  a  long  time, but she's sure she has said yes to
      everything a man could possibly ask for.

      She  just has to find out what this man wants that has made her girls
      so angry. Besides she sees a chance to teach her employees a lesson.

      So she goes over to Sarkozy and says that she's the best in the house
      and  is  available. She sits and talks with him. They frolic, giggle,
      drink and then she sits in his lap.

      Sarkozy leans forwards and whispers in her ear, "Can I pay in Euros?"