Every had your iphone autocorrect feature give a funny or unexpected result? I bet none of them were as funny as these auto-correct funnies from damnyouautocorrect.com!
Friday, September 9, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
The Simple Things
Want a FREE Telescope? We loved this one - it's a bit short on "features" but you get what you pay for:
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
Tech Support Request
Dear Tech Support, 18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.
I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.
Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.
Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is. Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be turned off.
Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money before uninstalling itself.
I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.
Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.
Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is. Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be turned off.
Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money before uninstalling itself.
Help requested please!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Why Women Live Longer Than Men
Why Women Live Longer Than Men (from Wikipedia): Women tend to have a lower mortality rate than men at every age. In the womb, male fetuses have a higher mortality rate (babies are conceived in a ratio of about 124 males to 100 females, but the ratio of those surviving to birth is only 105 males to 100 females). Among the smallest premature babies (those under 2 pounds or 900 g) females again have a higher survival rate. At the other extreme, about 90% of individuals aged 110 are female.
The reasons for this are not entirely certain. Traditional arguments tend to favor socio-environmental factors: historically, men have generally consumed more tobacco, alcohol and drugs than females in most societies, and are more likely to die from many associated diseases such as lung cancer, tuberculosis and cirrhosis of the liver.Men are also more likely to die from injuries, whether unintentional (such as car accidents) or intentional (suicide, violence, war). Men are also more likely to die from most of the leading causes of death (some already stated above) than women. Some of these in the United States include: cancer of the respiratory system, motor vehicle accidents, suicide, cirrhosis of the liver, emphysema, and coronary heart disease.These far outweigh the female mortality rate from breast cancer and cervical cancer etc.
Some argue that shorter male life expectancy is merely another manifestation of the general rule, seen in all mammal species, that larger individuals tend on average to have shorter lives.This biological difference occurs because women have more resistance to infections and degenerative diseases.
Why Women Live Longer Than Men (from the internet):
The reasons for this are not entirely certain. Traditional arguments tend to favor socio-environmental factors: historically, men have generally consumed more tobacco, alcohol and drugs than females in most societies, and are more likely to die from many associated diseases such as lung cancer, tuberculosis and cirrhosis of the liver.Men are also more likely to die from injuries, whether unintentional (such as car accidents) or intentional (suicide, violence, war). Men are also more likely to die from most of the leading causes of death (some already stated above) than women. Some of these in the United States include: cancer of the respiratory system, motor vehicle accidents, suicide, cirrhosis of the liver, emphysema, and coronary heart disease.These far outweigh the female mortality rate from breast cancer and cervical cancer etc.
Some argue that shorter male life expectancy is merely another manifestation of the general rule, seen in all mammal species, that larger individuals tend on average to have shorter lives.This biological difference occurs because women have more resistance to infections and degenerative diseases.
Why Women Live Longer Than Men (from the internet):
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
What a school cock-up
There is something about New Zealanders. A nation of just 4 Million produced the likes of Edmund Hillary, Peter Jackson, Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, Neil Finn, and the guys who did this on their last day at school!
The student prank from 2009 continues to haunt Fairfield College, in the North Island city of Hamilton, as the crude drawings burnt in to the grass with weed-killer have now been photographed by satellite cameras and are available for all to see on google earth.
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| Fairfield College, Hamilton NZ has an embarassing problem |
The student prank from 2009 continues to haunt Fairfield College, in the North Island city of Hamilton, as the crude drawings burnt in to the grass with weed-killer have now been photographed by satellite cameras and are available for all to see on google earth.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
A real children's book for the 21st Century
Following on from campaigns promoting "truth in advertising" and "truth in labelling", we see the trend extending in to other areas, including "truth in children's story books". One of the best examples is:
Go the F**k to Sleep is a real book by Adam Mansbach and illustrated by Ricardo Cortes. You can buy the "Go the F**k to Sleep" children's book at Amazon.com.
Here is the complete book (click on an image to enlarge, then use your "back arrow" to get back to this page)
Adam Mansbach’s novels include The End of the Jews, winner of the California Book
Award, and the bestselling Angry Black White Boy, a San Francisco Chronicle Best Book
of 2005. His fiction and essays have appeared in The New York Times Book Review, The
Believer, Granta, The Los Angeles Times, and many other publications. He is the 2010-11
New Voices Professor of Fiction at Rutgers University.
Ricardo Cortés has illustrated books about marijuana, electricity, the Jamaican bobsled
team, and Chinese food. His work has been featured in The New York Times, Vanity Fair,
Entertainment Weekly, New York Magazine, The Village Voice, and on CNN and FOX News.
He lives in Brooklyn, NY, where he is working on a book about the history of Coca-Cola and
cocaine. You can see his work at: Rmcortes.com
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| (click on image to enlarge) |
READER ADVISORY! The book contains rude words. It is NOT a children's book!
Adam Mansbach’s novels include The End of the Jews, winner of the California Book
Award, and the bestselling Angry Black White Boy, a San Francisco Chronicle Best Book
of 2005. His fiction and essays have appeared in The New York Times Book Review, The
Believer, Granta, The Los Angeles Times, and many other publications. He is the 2010-11
New Voices Professor of Fiction at Rutgers University.
Ricardo Cortés has illustrated books about marijuana, electricity, the Jamaican bobsled
team, and Chinese food. His work has been featured in The New York Times, Vanity Fair,
Entertainment Weekly, New York Magazine, The Village Voice, and on CNN and FOX News.
He lives in Brooklyn, NY, where he is working on a book about the history of Coca-Cola and
cocaine. You can see his work at: Rmcortes.com
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